Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Fulfilment ( cont. )

Natalie: Here. This is your answer.
Keira: (Chuckled). You gotta be kidding, right. A bible. You know I won't read this.
Natalie: Why not...Your soul gotta eat something.
Keira: What..
Natalie: I understand that emptiness you're feeling. You know. People are searching for worldly pleasures to fulfill their emotional being. But one thing they forget is their spiritual being. To have something to believe in. To ponder upon. Something to hang on to in times of hardship. A companionship. It's the one thing that merely human being and all the treasures in the world could never give. I was once sceptical about it. Thought it's just a tedious matter. But you know what...It changed everything.
Keira: I don't know if I will do this.
Natalie: You're in control of you own life. You decide on what you want to do. But it doesn't hurt to give it a try. You got nothing to lose.
Keira felt a sudden rush of adrenalin throughout her body. A feeling that she herself could not understand. It's nearly midnight. She bade Natalie good night.
Driving home, deep thoughts came racing through her mind. How come she never thought about it. Her mind came wandering to her small bible buried inside one of her old boxes. There must be dust all over it. She thought with a bitter smile. She couldn't remember the last time she held it. Somehow, blissful ignorance crept in. The kind of feeling she felt only existed during her childhood years. It was beautiful innocence. Just like an empty cup that is being poured, she could feel her heart being filled with serenity.
"How could I forget the one thing that is there all the time. My relationship with Him. It's the one thing that merely human being and all the treasures in the world could never give." Her cheeks felt warm. There were tears rolling down from her eyes. They're not because of sadness. She knew from that very moment she had found her fulfilment.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Fulfilment

The disco lights spread on every corner of the club. Everybody was grooving to the music. The dj's remix of 'Move Ya Body' had never been better. Lads and lasses were intoxicated by the rhythm. Keira was one of them. Her stilettos complimented her long slender legs. Her glittered mini skirts reflected the blinking lights. Her black halter top fitted really well on her slim figure. She looked undeniably attractive with her shoulder-length highlighted tousle hair. No doubts guys were captivated by her body movement. She really could dance.
It was her usual weekend nights. The night wouldn't be completed without alcohol in her blood. From a few glasses of Tequila shots to her favourite Chivas and sometimes a few bottles of beer. How many times had she reminded herself to be in control of her drinking habit but the urge of getting that temporary pleasure was just too irresistable. Everytime, her friend had to drive her home because she was too drunk to drive. The next morning would be just another hangover day. But she's immuned to it. Weekend nights would always be her favourite time. There's one thing that she's proud of. She doesn't smoke. Affected by the experience of having lost her favourite uncle to lung cancer because of too much cigarettes.
She's hip and all that. "But why am I not happy?" Now and again, the thought came to her mind. She's an independent young woman and doesn't care that she's single. All the guys she thought, are just looking for the opportunities to bed her. Where have all the good guys gone? Oh, yeah. The good guys only want decent ladies to be their girlfriends. The ones who like to stay at home and make cooking as their favourite past time. The ones who would never listen to Eminem and always glued to their seats in front of their favourite soap opera. Going to the club every week doesn't mean I'm an unworthy person or someone who can't be relied on. I just love to have fun, she thought. But it's not about men. Keira felt something missing inside her. It's dying to find some kind of fulfilment.
One day, while doing her groceries shopping, she bumped into an old friend whom she had never met for years. They were so delightful to see each other again. After exchanging numbers, they went their separate ways. Keira was excited. Natalie used to club and party hard with her. Keira decided to take Natalie on a girls' night out that weekend. She gave her a call.

Keira: Hello! Hi, Nat! Are you free tomorrow night?
Natalie: Yeah, I guess so. What's on?
Keira: How about clubbing? You know...just like the old days.
Natalie: Wow! Clubbing. I haven't club for a long time.
Keira: Yeah! So, how about it? I'll fetch you tomorrow at 11.30 pm okay?
Natalie: Naa....I don't feel like it. How about dinner at my house? There're so many things we can catch up on. The club is just too noisy.
Keira: Ooookay....But promise me you'll join me next time, kay.
Natalie: Not a problem, dear.

The next night, Keira came over to Natalie's house and had dinner together. They had a nice chat afterwards. Reminiscing the old times and laughing at their zany memories. They were chatting on and on until they both ran out ouf stories. Silence made it's way between them. Then out of the blue, Keira confided her feeling of emptiness to Natalie. She listened attentively to every word Keira said. Keira wasn't hoping for an answer. She just needed someone to confide in. For her, Natalie is just the right confidante.

Keira: I just don't know why...
Natalie: You know what. I had the same situation before.
Keira: So what did you do?
Natalie: Hang on a sec. I wanna show you something.
Natalie got off from the couch and went inside her room. Keira was curious on what Natalie had in store for her. Then Natalie came out, holding a book in her hand.....

To be continued.....

Unconditional Love

Sandy kept her eyes on her personal computer. Her body was tired but her brain was fighting it. She's been in front of the computer for hours. Cyber chat had opened a new world for her. A world that she's been longing to exist. At first she thought cyber chat was just for loners. People who thought they're not good looking enough to make friends in person. But once she's been on it, there's no stopping her. She doesn't think she's bad looking though.
There were just too many people she had chatted with. Her list of chatter's name was getting long. But none of them really interest her. Until came Owen. That was his nickname. He gave the usual hello and introduction. Sandy, trying to be polite as she could gave her reply. He's different, Sandy thought. They kept on chatting. She realised they had a lot of things in common. He's into music and claimed to be pretty good in playing the piano. Sandy loves a pianist. She's also into music but she could only play the guitar. Owen likes to play basketball. Sandy used to play basketball and netball. Besides sharing almost the same interests, they both could express their feelings really well.
Now, it's been 2 months and they've been chatting every day. From just calling names, they began to call each other "dear". She's single. He's also single. So, why not? Sandy was hopeful. He's the one, she thought. From merely chatting, they began to sms and ring each other. Sandy typed her message. "Dont u thnk it's time 4 us 2 meet up?" 2 minutes later her mobile beeped. Owen replied, " I'm scared wen u c me I''m nt wat u xpect me to b. " " I dont care hw u look like. Hw long r we goin 2 be like this?" Sandy replied with quite a big disappoinment. "I'm sorry. I js dont knw. But no matter wat, u knw dat I do love u. " He replied, trying hard to sound that he really cared.
For days, Sandy insisted on them to meet up. Then one day, he just stopped calling and sms-ing her. Sandy kept on ringing and sending sms to him but there's not even a single reply. Sandy was so frustrated. She just couldn't sleep that night. Finally, she managed to force herself to sleep after sobbing over the unreplied calls and messages.
The next morning, her mobile rang, waking her up from her deep sleep. She grabbed the mobile phone beside her. She looked at the small screen. It's Owen's name. Sandy was so delightful. She felt like her world is built up again. Hastily pressing the YES keypad, she blurted out, "Hello, dear!" "Hello, is this Sandy?" It's a woman's voice. "Yes, speaking." Sandy replied, curious and trying to hold back her anger. "Hi, Sandy! This is Owen's mom. I'm sorry I have to say this. But he's been ignoring his studies lately. I'm worried about him. His PMR is next month. But he's always on the phone and chatting. I'm afraid you have to leave him some space. At least, until after the exam."
"PMR??? He'll be taking PMR this year? But, he's....he's 24.." Sandy's body started to tremble. "24? That boy must be out of his mind. He's just 15 for goodness sake. Don't tell me you.....Oh, no.....How old are you, Sandy?" Sandy dropped her handphone. She's 24.
Originally written on January 5, 2006